Joke Thread

AxeBlind · Posted: Sat Feb 25, 2006 4:39 pm Post subject:

Haha, actually my uncle graduated valedictorian of his TAMU Vet class, now he is retired from that and is a contractor. You can make a shitload of money being a vet.
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Wang Chung · Posted: Thu Mar 02, 2006 9:02 pm Post subject:

A lesson in honesty.

At Duke University, there we re four sophomores taking
Chemistry and all of them had an "A" so far. These four friends
were so confident that the weekend before finals, they decided
to visit some friends and have a big party. They had a great time,
but after all the hearty partying, they slept all day Sunday and
didn't make it back to Duke until early Monday morning.

Rather than taking the final then, they decided that after the
final they would explain to their professor why they missed it.
They said that they visited friends but on the way back they
had a flat tire. As a result, they missed the final.

The Professor agreed they could make up the final the next
day. The guys were excited and relieved. They studied that night
for the exam. The Professor placed them in separate rooms and
gave them a test booklet. They quickly answered the first problem
worth 5 points. Cool, they thought!
Each one in separate rooms, thinking this was going to be easy.

Then they turned the page...On the second page was written:
"For 95 points: Which tire?"
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is now -=|CT|=- Frothy Mixture

Corbin · Posted: Sun Mar 05, 2006 4:21 pm Post subject:

someones ttrrrriiicckkyyy
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Its been a While my dear Ct

2shoes · Posted: Sun Mar 05, 2006 4:37 pm Post subject:

Corbin wrote:

someones ttrrrriiicckkyyy

RunDMC?
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Sparrow wrote:

...if pirates stays on bf1942 i'd hate to see the community grow even smaller, but i know i'll always be around and i hope the rest of you will too!

Special Jimmy wrote:

This mod is rightfully ours, and fuck everyone that stands in our way.

fair winds and following seas, lil shoes 8/3/94-6/23/09

K9 Carlos · Posted: Wed Mar 08, 2006 5:38 pm Post subject:

Top Ten Reasons Why Men Prefer Guns Over Women...!!

#10 You can trade an old 44 for a new 22.

# 9. You can keep one gun at home and another for on the road.

# 8. If you admire a friend's gun and tell him so, he will probably let you
try it out a few times.

# 7 Your gun doesn't mind if you keep another gun for a backup.

# 6. Your gun will stay with you even if you run out of ammo.

# 5. A gun doesn't take up a lot of closet space

# 4. Guns function normally every day of the month.

# 3. A gun doesn't ask, "Does this dress make me look fat?"

# 2. A gun doesn't mind if you go to sleep after you use it.

And the number one reason a gun is favored over a woman....

# 1. YOU CAN BUY A SILENCER FOR A GUN
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-=|CT|=- K9 Carlos

SupaFly wrote:

barreling axe is like throwing a hot dog down a hallway these days

Quote:

I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was going to blame you.

2shoes · Posted: Mon Mar 20, 2006 9:10 pm Post subject:

http://www.whitelinemagazine.com/jokes.htm

bottom right
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Sparrow wrote:

...if pirates stays on bf1942 i'd hate to see the community grow even smaller, but i know i'll always be around and i hope the rest of you will too!

Special Jimmy wrote:

This mod is rightfully ours, and fuck everyone that stands in our way.

fair winds and following seas, lil shoes 8/3/94-6/23/09

massive · Posted: Tue Mar 21, 2006 11:48 am Post subject:

2shoes wrote:

http://www.whitelinemagazine.com/jokes.htm

bottom right

funny, but you do get the "LAZY" award for the day
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Vlad Piranha wrote:

I'm offended that a zombie holocaust isn't on the list. It would be terrifying, sure, but it would be pretty sweet if you think about it.

Corbin · Posted: Tue Mar 21, 2006 6:31 pm Post subject:

a man with 5 penises walks into the doctors office

the doctor asks him how do your pants fit?

he replys: like a glove

this one is sort of racist and i hope no one is offended but it roffled my waffles

what are the four shortest books in history

1. famous jewish astronauts
2. 10,000 years of german humor
3. irish gourmet cooking
4. negroes ive met while yachting.
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Its been a While my dear Ct

firefox_71 · Posted: Tue Mar 21, 2006 6:34 pm Post subject:

too funny
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Comradekil · Posted: Tue Mar 21, 2006 9:42 pm Post subject:

here's my favorite anti-semitic joke

how many jews fit in an SUV 3 in the back 2 in the front and 1 in the ashtray...

hmm, should i have not posted this? if offended write a letter to

I dont give a f*ck
223 w. 900 n
Decatur Indiana 46733
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Erwin Rommel · Posted: Tue Mar 21, 2006 10:02 pm Post subject:

And people call me a Nazi...
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-=|CT|=-Descartes

AxeBlind · Posted: Tue Mar 21, 2006 11:27 pm Post subject:

Shut up Nazi and go back to your math hole. Very Happy

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CountChocula · Posted: Tue Mar 21, 2006 11:38 pm Post subject:

lewl, math hole
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Quote:

[20:43] -≠∫ĆŤ∫≠- ŜρξčļαГ јỈмMﻻ: we'll aim for bender
[20:43] -≠∫ĆŤ∫≠- ŜρξčļαГ јỈмMﻻ: but use a lot of napalm

Erwin Rommel · Posted: Wed Mar 22, 2006 12:16 am Post subject:

Well actually quite a few of the good 20th century mathematicians were Jewish.

Q: What's purple and commutes?

A: An Abelian Grape! ahahahaha
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-=|CT|=-Descartes

Cpt. LandLubber · Posted: Wed Mar 22, 2006 12:42 am Post subject:

A white, a black and a jew is sitting on the bus. On that bus there was an irritating fly, the black and the jew were trying to catch this fly when suddenly the white simply stretches out his arm and takes it. "Ooh, could I have that, please?" the jew asks slyly. "Sure, here you go" says the white, and gives him the fly. Then the jew turns to the black and asks: "Wanna buy it?" "Yes, please" the black replies, gives the jew a dollar and promptly eats the fly.

Rolling Eyes

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