Writin' of Stealth

Stealth · Posted: Thu Jan 12, 2006 6:41 pm Post subject: Writin' of Stealth

I've heard some guys IMing me stating that they like it when I write. Welp, I'm gonna give this a try and I'm gonna posting some writings every now and then, kinda like Shoes does his thing. If no one likes it, I'll stop posting, but always write.

I don't mind anyone posting in here, since I'd like some critique on the work.

Some are sappy, some are humerous, Some are poems, some would be just convos... But it just all depends.

For starters:

[19:08] -??????-?t??l�?: Love is more than hugs and kisses, being though each other's crap and just saying three words. I don't know what it is exactly, but I know how to describe it. Though it's very difficult, b/c I'm not even sure what it is or how to know you have it, as no one does. That lingering sensation near that person, just everything seems as though if it were prefect. There's no confrontations, no worries, no regret, and no anger. Peace, as you would call it, could revolve a great deal around "love."

[19:09] -??????-?t??l�?: Could it be the words spoken? The bond? The silence? Does beauty have anything to do with it?

[19:09] -??????-?t??l�?: How bout the friction? How the air seems to condense to form condensation on your body? The nervousness of being around that person, but so calm at the same time?

[19:10] -??????-?t??l�?: The entity as a whole... that could be described as an eternal essence of truth and self nuturing as it seems to take care of you but it's as if you have to have someone else take care of you. In this case, the person you "love."

[19:12] -??????-?t??l�?: Love it too overused for a word that no one quite understands. The warmth it provides, but perhaps it could be an illusion. A fictsation in your mind just so strong that everything else deems worthless. No would matter much after that

[19:12] -??????-?t??l�?: *nothing

[19:13] -??????-?t??l�?: Why would anyone seeks something they know nothing about? Why does it ponder the minds of so many people? People fear the things they cannot understand. But why is love the exception? Looking for purity? Truth?

[19:13] -??????-?t??l�?: It's taking that one step forward and not knowing whether or not your about to fall of the edge. That's what love is in my own eyes.

The story behind that was me in a downwright outrage of everything in this world. The conversation was very deep and if you notice, it didn't take me long to write that much at all. Just an explanation of love.
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Motherfucking Triangles! Being all three sided n' shit, who do they think they are?!

Stealth · Posted: Thu Jan 12, 2006 7:01 pm Post subject:

Military Man

I see you standing there,
With your finely pressed pants,
That serious, constant stare.
I feel the respect.

Your no longer what you used to be,
For your a new person.
The glare of the sun doesn't even shine on you,
Like it used to.

The warmth collides around you,
For some spiritual sense,
As if nothing mattered,
But it was all about you.

Where have you gone to?
What place have you been to,
And What did you see?
But I finally get it.

I wasn't there for you son,
And though I tried,
You were pushed away from me.
And I fucking salute you for all you've done.
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Motherfucking Triangles! Being all three sided n' shit, who do they think they are?!

K9 Carlos · Posted: Thu Jan 12, 2006 7:09 pm Post subject:

good stuff
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-=|CT|=- K9 Carlos

SupaFly wrote:

barreling axe is like throwing a hot dog down a hallway these days

Quote:

I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was going to blame you.

Roscoe · Posted: Thu Jan 12, 2006 9:24 pm Post subject:

the military man poem is really really good Very Happy

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anonymousity · Posted: Thu Jan 12, 2006 9:46 pm Post subject:

I like

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♥♪!?

Stealth · Posted: Sat Jan 14, 2006 6:36 pm Post subject:

One day I lost all hope and I did something I was very ashamed of. But I screamed out a prayer to god and here's what was said....

Heaven!!! Power above thy stars! Consume my carcass and render me anew, with Earth's binding passion! Purify me of my foul deeds and evils by lifting my heart and striking it as if it were to be hit by an arrow. Release my anger, so once again I can be cleansed!

I was 14 or 15. But it was so moving I wrote it down and I just now came across it.
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Motherfucking Triangles! Being all three sided n' shit, who do they think they are?!

Peachy Pete · Posted: Sun Jan 15, 2006 4:27 pm Post subject:

Stealth wrote:

Military Man

I see you standing there,
With your finely pressed pants,
That serious, constant stare.
I feel the respect.

Your no longer what you used to be,
For your a new person.
The glare of the sun doesn't even shine on you,
Like it used to.

The warmth collides around you,
For some spiritual sense,
As if nothing mattered,
But it was all about you.

Where have you gone to?
What place have you been to,
And What did you see?
But I finally get it.

I wasn't there for you son,
And though I tried,
You were pushed away from me.
And I fucking salute you for all you've done.

You may want to consider removing some of the punctuation, as it detracts from the overall flow, making it basically prose with line breaks.

Some of the stanzas flow much better than the others, perhaps you may want to work on your syllabic patterns within the individual lines, as well as work to have an overall theme.

Also, you might want to work on your use of possessive pronouns before you submit it anywhere Razz

Nice work nonetheless.
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"The computer can't tell you the emotional story. It can give you the exact mathematical design, but what's missing is the eyebrows." -Frank Zappa
3/30/2005 14:39:55 : # [Global] -=|CT|=- K9 Carlos: we're gonna auction your boat on Ebay

Stealth · Posted: Mon Jan 16, 2006 1:37 am Post subject:

I don't submit any work of mine to blogs n' such. I just don't like to publish it, but I only published it here b/c it was requested. But, when I do write it, I right it then and there, unedited. So whatever I typed was what you see. Perhaps if I gave more thought to it, it may flow easier.
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Motherfucking Triangles! Being all three sided n' shit, who do they think they are?!

AxeBlind · Posted: Mon Jan 16, 2006 2:44 am Post subject:

Still great, you should make anthology of your poetry and find a publisher Very Happy

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theboomboom · Posted: Mon Jan 16, 2006 1:30 pm Post subject:

We really ought to have a whole thread on nothing but philosophies
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You do not say that the wheel is fatigued, yet the body is as material as the wheel

firefox_71 · Posted: Thu Jan 26, 2006 7:58 pm Post subject:

Hey Stealth, do you own BF2? If so, I would like you to do the recap of a scrim between DP and DP...heh, which is Dawgg Pownd vs. Dusty Pirates. You painted the picture of the CT/SD match quite well. Excellent work Wink

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theboomboom · Posted: Thu Jan 26, 2006 8:04 pm Post subject:

Tell us when and we can setup another scrim Smile

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You do not say that the wheel is fatigued, yet the body is as material as the wheel

Stealth · Posted: Thu Jan 26, 2006 10:30 pm Post subject:

Sorry, I have BF2, but I don't have the computer capable of playing it. Which I'm hoping to change soon once I get a job.
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Motherfucking Triangles! Being all three sided n' shit, who do they think they are?!

Stealth · Posted: Sat Mar 25, 2006 8:48 pm Post subject:

Weee... Stealth can write reports and scrims again. Yay!

And now for a little in depth analysis of what you shouldn't ever do.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Don't not Lie, Cheat, or Steal

If you have to lie, Lie in your Loved One's arms.

If you have to Cheat, Cheat Death.

If you have to Steal, Then you better not be stealing from me, else you're getting the FUCK beat outta ya, mother ***ker! Daw sk33t!!!11!2#1!
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Motherfucking Triangles! Being all three sided n' shit, who do they think they are?!

Comradekil · Posted: Sun Mar 26, 2006 1:38 pm Post subject:

I Lie, I Cheat, I Steal.

Viva la raza Wink

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